Mary Cain Benevolence Fund
Mary Margaret Cain is a single mother of three sons...a 24 year old and 21 year old twins with autism. The latter is bright but semi-verbal, is not yet fully toilet trained, and often refuses to leave his room for scheduled activities and their special needs school...though, as you can see, they both were recently graduated!
The New Horizons Foundation and one of its board members, a personal friend of Michael and Elizabeth Darby (Navigator staff for 20 years), have established this benevolent account for Mary Margaret, their daughter. This short term (six months to a year) emergency fund is meant to help cover her basics, such as housing, utilities, groceries, car/gasoline, medical/ dental expenses, etc. It is established to help relieve some of her many current stresses, this one financial, until she can recover at least part of the seven years of money legally owed her by her former husband. Because of many unexplainably delayed legal proceedings, she presently owes her attorney an additional $6000, with the next hearing set for January 2022. (Additionally, her former husband, for his financial gain, is now suing her for guardianship of the twins [whom she has almost singlehandedly raised] and reduced future alimony payments...which translate to additional time, emotional and legal stresses for Mary Margaret.)
So what better timing for this fund! Her former husband and his insurance are to cover all of the boys’ dental expenses, except the co-pay, which they share. So far, he has not been willing to do that. The twins’ dental needs, necessarily requiring children’s dental and anesthesiology specialists, total $8000-$9000. Mary Margaret is herself long overdue for two crowns, an added expense. Additionally, there are no funds for any kind of assistance for her, after school help for the boys or respite care.
Though her former husband has the time and financial ability to honor his commitments to his family, through his irresponsibility in both, every area of Mary Margaret and her boys’ lives has been affected. They lost their family home three years ago, the cost of living has risen drastically since the terms of their divorce decree in 2011, and all the time involved and rising costs of their medical and legal issues were not taken into account at that time.
Through most of the involved years she’s had to borrow a great deal of money from her parents, to cover her former husband’s arbitrary monthly shortfall of alimony/child support. Though much of that amount has been a gift, the rest needs to be repaid to their retirement fund, the Darbys being 84 and 79. (Many scientific in-depth studies agree it costs $2.4 million for lifetime care of one person with autism. Certainly with two, Mary Margaret’s former husband’s full support is vital.)
Mary Margaret suffered a life threatening stroke in September and a recent fall and concussion. Even after many doctors appointments, two CT scans, several MRIs, an angiogram, a sleep study with EEG, and inserted heart loop recorder...still the cause of her stroke, except for extreme and unrelenting stress, has not been decided upon...nor what all preventative measures should be. God is using time to heal her slowly...her speech is almost back to normal and her confusion less and less. She’s becoming even better at continuing in her role as a single mom!
Many friends have lovingly referred to Mary Margaret as, “Mrs. Job.” But we believe her ability to survive these many years, without totally losing it physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually is summed up in her abiding faith and recent statement: “I look at my disappointments like this: God’s protection. Disappointments are less hard when my attitude is formed by His sovereignty. My good, His glory."
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